AFTER A BREAK-UP, WHAT’S NEXT? (Part I) – Cherylbliss Julius

This is one of the real stuff that has been sending people into depression. Hmmmmmmm we might not want to accept the fact but that’s the truth. Relationship saga has made so many lose a deal, go into huge debt and even crash a million-dollar firm.Close your eyes and think deep down, remember that bestie you trusted so much, that sex partner who vowed never to lick your photos and that girl/boyfriend who at the beginning was everything you’ve ever prayed for.

But what happened?What happened? What was the problem?This is a strained question we all are yet to get an answer to it, we are terribly seeking whatever transpired and…We keep on searching, then seek healing.Hey! Forget whatever. Problems are bound to arise no matter how peaceful you are or one party has pledged to overlook, we won’t be arguing if nothing was the problem.

So how do you pull over and stand tall after a terrible or easy-going heartbreak?

TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT IT
Yeahhhhhh!
I know you would say I  can’t talk to people to avoid them becoming a journalistic fellow cause of my pain, we all know that you can’t stop the mouth from spurring out their thoughts and so on.You know somewhat? You could have saved your pains from been spread if you had built good relationships with at least a sibling of yours, roommate or even having someone by your side you both talk and help each other grow.Even by any means, you don’t have any of this, which is fine not to then. 

Also Read: When A Breakup Becomes A Breakthrough

YOU SHOULD SPEAK TO YOUR MIRROR

This is you talking to your shadow and mind; get a mirror if you don’t have one. Seat in front of it, and do a question and answer in your quiet time.You would love this, at least your mirror won’t speculate any rumour but then mind you the walls do have ears which are; ensure no one is around and if you live in an apartment make sure the music is on to avoid nose poking neighbours crawling into your matter.

GRIEVE ALL BY YOURSELF

So, there was this time I had a bone-breaking break up which almost cost me my job and professional growth,  cause all I could do in the office was cry and work less. My reports and numbers started going slim. goshhhhh! It was terrible and all I could do was tearing into my keypads.I quickly move out my keypads to avoid spoilage which rendered a pause to the job at hand, those moments were almost like a dead end to me. I thought and thought about the issues, it was like I was dreaming of and why are all these things happening to me. At this point my money stopped growing too cause I didn’t pay attention to my business too, I stalled suppliers and clients and only suppliers and clients who knew my office and home address could get to me. (Meanwhile, in my case I called it off, cause it wasn’t getting better).

On a Wednesday morning, about 9:15 am as I picked up my phone I got a notification of #WCW of myself I posted, yeah! I could sense this hipper in me. I took a glance at the post and went through the words and immediately my future self-flashes and it aroused my esteem. After a sort work that Wednesday, I went home grieved the hell out of my heart, next morning swelled eyes that couldn’t outer a single tear.  I stepped up, could no more cry during the day at work. At this point, I knew I was ready to heal and see a therapist. Mind you it’s preferable to grieve all you can with yourself or a friends shoulder before heading to see a therapist. 

YOU SHOULD SEE A THERAPIST

 A counsellor will listen to you, pat your back but will not cry for you or with you.Do you see the very difference between a friend and a counsellor?That’s why it is necessary not to be a one-man squad cause in the dark days you will be left alone without care and enthusiasm knocking and walking through your front door.You should talk to a therapist to avoid going into depression and polluting your personal and professional growth.

HANGOUT WITH POSITIVE FRIENDS

Check out and stay with people whose positive vibes can overwhelm the state you are in, not with people whose effort is just to blame your ass and If you’re a clubber, dress up and go shake the lit outta your soul, “no be only you kill Jesus” (you’re not the worst sinner). 
The above piece will sincerely guide you on how to pull over and stand tall at your place of work, after a long hard or easy breakup.Watch out for the second part of this article.